Friday, March 6, 2009

Monkey's paw

Many years ago...how many? 15? 20? 10? I don't remember; I didn't write it down...
Many years ago, I sat out on the front porch of the house I owned in Eastside Estates, smoking and looking at the stars. It was sometime after Bram and I had started dating, I know, because I loved Bram from our first date and I remember sitting on the porch, my heart full of love and yearning.
I know that Bram and I were not dating at the time and I was so very sad, so sad. I sat out on my front porch after the kids had gone to bed, looking at the stars, smoking, and wishing Bram were with me. I looked up into the night sky, pondering existence, wondering why my life always seemed so off track, why other people seemed to get what they want while I always seemed to lose, and wondering who was in charge of all of this and what they were up to.
I saw a shooting star and I made a wish on it. I wished out loud to the universe to let Bram and me be together, to let us find love and laughter and a good life together.
And someone, something up there heard me and granted my wish.
My life with Bram was charmed. We were never rich, but we got by. We were happy and rarely argued. My kids had a dad and I had a husband--the most perfect husband I could ever have hoped for. I felt that Bram and I were meant to be, that it was ordained in the stars that we be together, that nothing and no one could ever ruin our Eden.
But it seems I forgot the truth in the old stories of Genies, magic fish, the monkey's paw. Wish-granters are sly and out to trick you. You have to be very careful about what you wish for, how you phrase your wish because wish-granters are always looking for the twist.
I was granted my wish. I got to be with Bram, to be loved by Bram, to feel safe and adored and strong as long as Bram was with me.
But I forgot to specify how long.

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